Our 8hr, 12hr, 16 hr, 20hr, and 24hr anger management class are accepted by most court, probation officers and county magistrates in the Harris County and most US cities
- Ditch denial anger management can help
All three experts we spoke with describe denial as the go-to debt anger coping mechanism, which is ultimately destructive. “Financial denial is when you stop paying attention to your finances, you don’t track them and you don’t open your statements. It’s a way to deal with anger — you feel better (about your debt) because you’re not thinking about it,” Klontz explains.
“The constant anger leads people into denial, and vagueness and magical thinking,” says Somers. “The sense of loss of control is big, the sense of being trapped and also this cycle of shame, guilt and remorse.”
Consolidating your debt with loans can feel great and help your credit rating, but it’s only a band-aid unless you deal with why you got into debt in the first place. “Any breathing room consolidation affords makes people feel like they have they’ve got room to start spending again and, within a very short period of time, they’re often back where they started because they still haven’t dealt with the fact that their income isn’t enough to match the payments,” Somers says.
All three experts agree that facing the shame for your debt can help alleviate the anger of it. Klontz says this starts with reflecting upon your learned behavior around money. “You blame your parents — I’m joking but I’m actually not,” Klontz says. “Debt doesn’t mean you’re lazy, crazy and stupid. Your beliefs around money make perfect sense and predict your outcomes — your income, the whole thing.”
- Accept the blame anger management can help
Though it’s not easy, Klontz says accepting the blame for your debt is empowering and can ultimately lead to your success. “Please try to blame yourself for as much of your situation as possible, so you can get to the root of why you’re in debt — and there’s so much value in that,” he says. To de-shame debt, Klontz reminds his clients that they are by no means alone — most wealthy people have faced financial adversity more than once. “The average millionaire reports about three major financial catastrophes in their life. The average non-millionaire? Slightly less than one,” he says.
- Seek strategic support anger management can help
Ultimately, the only remedy for debt anger starts with facing the financial music, opening your bills and taking full account and responsibility for your debt. The experts advise enlisting the help of a trusted financial advisor, perhaps from a financial services non-profit or a credit union, or a financial planner or a CPA, to help you put together a budget and payment plan that will give you some much-needed encouragement that your situation can and will improve.
- Take pride in your progress anger management can help
Clayman says sharing the progress you make toward debt elimination with loved ones can also help destigmatize your situation. “This not only helps you feel supported and accountable, it may even inspire others to share their debt repayment journeys with you as well. Decreasing our sense of isolation or personal shame can be a significant way to combat debt anger and keep us on track,” she says.
- Keep debt in perspective anger management can help
If there’s absolutely no way out of debt, Klontz advises consulting with a bankruptcy attorney. “I have an exercise with my clients where we go down the rabbit hole of the absolute worst-case scenarios and sometimes, they realize the worst-case scenario isn’t really that bad. You can die from this anger, so is it really worth dying over? You can file for bankruptcy many times — people do it all the time. Sometimes it’s a great business decision and is something you should do,” he explains. “Your self-worth is not your net worth.”
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